Episode 13 – Here Comes the Sun – Lessons I Learned From My Mom

In this final episode of 2022, I want to share with you what it means to operate at your highest potential. It’s not about growth at all costs, but instead attuning to what success feels like for you, attracting the right people and experiences, and amplifying your star-powered radiance. As I teach you these markers of highest potentials, I reflect back on my 2022 in metrics and numbers to show you that sometimes downturns are you operating and choosing your highest potential, energy and capacity.

In this episode:

• Lessons from my mom
• What I’m grateful for
• Things I’m still learning
• Synastry chart of my Mom and I

What I learned from my mom:

Happiness is a choice – I recognized at a very young age of 5 that happiness wasn’t something you could buy or have, instead it was a choice that you made every day. I don’t know if my mom ever learned that, but I learned it from her.

How to cook – my mom was known for her cooking, from roast chickens and turkeys to parties filled with food. This I definitely inherited from her.

How to play the clarinet – In middle school, we had the choice between art and music. I wanted to join art with my friends, but she insisted I play the clarinet, even bringing one home and finding me a private clarinet teacher well before middle school. She showed me how to put it together and some simple fingerings. It was so easy and fun, and I still play the clarinet. Being a musician has been an opportunity of a life time.

Hard work – Around the same time in middle school, I picked up this habit of hard work where I’d practice hours a day, holing up in my room to avoid my mom’s outbursts. If I was in my room working away at something, I’d be ok. In a way, I felt that I was doing the work for both of us.

Consequences of choices – My mom’s end of life was based on layers upon layers of bad choices. Looking for the magic pill that makes all the pain, suffering go away. The ultimate bypass that doesn’t do any real healing. Thanks to her lessons, I have made many different choices in my life.

To make choices before choices are made for you – plan, prepare for the inevitable

Abundance is a mindset – My mom had sooooo much, but she never felt rich. This always baffled me. Even till the end. I absolutely learned the power of abundance thinking and gratitude from her, I wish she had learned it as well.

Style and taste – Our house was always beautiful and organized. While it wasn’t my taste exactly, I did learn the appreciation of fine things and timeless style.

Still things I’m learning:

I don’t have to do it alone – I’m choosing to be by myself at this time although so many of my Hawaii family members have reached out asking if I wanted company. I will in a bit, but right now, I want to process how I am feeling, I want to do this in solitude for the time being. I spent so much of my childhood depending only on myself to figure out the hard things, this is something I am still unraveling, that I don’t have to do it alone. In life, work, love, or family.

That in joy and connection comes conflict and challenge – Like my mom, I can be an avoider. Cutting experiences and people off when I don’t want to face conflict. I recognize this, especially with David and Rocket. I still need my space to process the initial conflict within me before I can reach out again. But that second step of reaching out again is what I’m still learning. To recreate a stronger bond of reconnection. That relationships will always have both, connection and challenge.

What I am grateful for

Freedom to pursue my dreams

Unconditional love – I knew I was everything to my mom.